Life of BAI #SumanKaku #Stories

She’s the woman who would pray daily for people to have babies!

It was the last day of June 2016 and as per routine Suman kaku (our malishwali bai) had come to give malish and bath to our 4 month old daughter. We generally have conversations on how to raise the baby and stuff like that. But today was a different - she told us 'her' story.

Suman kaku is a nav-vari clad self-made woman. She got married at the age of 13 to her atya’s son. She is from Mangaon and child marriage was not an uncommon affair there. By the time she was 20, she had 3 children!

As a newly married girl, when she entered her village, she had to remove her chappals, hold them in her hand and walk barefoot. This was a norm among the newly-wed brides. It was arrogance of the bride if she walked in the village with her chappals on.

She also had to have the pallu of her saree over her head all the time. If her father-in-law or mother-in-law were around, she had to pull her pallu down and cover her face. With this, she would be giving respect to her in-laws. This practice exists in India, especially among the Marwadis, Gujaratis, North Indians and other sections of the society. In local Gujarati language, it is called as ‘laaj’, which in a way means to give respect. But Suman kaku was a little ahead of times and refused to have her pallu over her head. Her reason being it was inconvenient to carry the pallu over her head!

Suman bai got her first period at the age of 14 after which she had gone to her mother’s place. And for 4 months she didn’t get her period again. When she suddenly began to realise that her tummy was looking bigger, is when her mother told her that she was probably expecting! At the age of 14 she got her first period and her first child.

Her husband died at a young age. She’s 55 right now, stays in Dharavi and goes many houses to do malish of the new born and new moms. Her entire childhood was spent in playing. She never attended any school. Despite all this, she manages to read the bus numbers, has a Rs. 3,000 kitty (also called Beecee) and has an active bank account. She’s an independent woman who makes a decent living, earning Rs. 20,000 to Rs. 30,000 depending on the season of baby deliveries.